You are going through something huge. A faith crisis is big. It is everything. Leaving your religion is very life shattering. It has rocked your world.
Your emotions are all over the place. You are feeling all the feels. Very deeply.
Part of what you are going through most likely includes worrying about how your decisions are affecting your family and friends, yes?
Listen, this is a hard one for some of us to understand. It has taken me awhile to get to this point.
You are not responsible for anyone else's thoughts and feelings.
You are having your own thoughts and feelings about what is going on with you and all you are discovering with and about your faith crisis.
You get to manage your own mind around all of these issues and so do your loved ones.
You get to move forward with your new way of thinking and so do your loved ones.
You are not in charge of how "they" will respond or react or experience emotions. Let them go through their own line of thinking, even if it does not align with yours.
You can let go of the feeling bad about how your decisions are "making them feel" because you cannot control that. THEY are responsible for how they feel.
You work on you. That is it.
When we grow up with a very specific religious frame work, part of that includes feelings of worthiness, being on the path, judgement, "being" a certain way and all of those things affect others, right? It is very much part of the conditioning you have gone through.
What if, you could put down the burden of carrying around how everyone else is going to think about this?
Read that sentence again. What if?
As we have discussed before, those in your life will have lots of thoughts and opinions about what you are doing. Let them. But also do not let it keep you stifled.
Work on managing your own thoughts and feelings. Let the rest go.
Easier said than done, you are thinking?
Yes, this is why you practice.
Creating new thoughts, that you can believe, take practice.
When you believe the thought, "I am not responsible for how others feel" you will begin to feel better about what you are going through.
This is the magical work of coaching. We will work on this. We will practice.
Of course, we will dive deep into what you are going through specifically, but do you see where I am going with this?
Can you be be open to thinking the thought...
"I am not responsible for how others feel about my decision to leave the church."
Feel the freedom you will feel when you truly believe that thought.
You got this.
I will walk it with you.